Giving up Something Good for Something Better.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Mixed Up

"The rain fell slow, down on all the roofs of uncertainty.
I thought of you and the years, and all the sadness, fell away from me."
- Pink Floyd 

I hate not knowing what I want. I hate liking my body. 
I hate looking in the mirror and feeling like my curves are good where they are.
But really, I hate remembering the next morning, or the next hour, that I am fat.

I'm stuck at 110 lbs. Stuck. Too fat.
I had cereal and milk.
I purged.

But most of all, I hate that I now have to confess to all of you that I am not strong today...

I don't know what to think.
Tomorrow, when I am thinking "clearly" because I've had more than enough to eat, I will feel strong again and be ready to push myself hard again.

Today is a bad day.

I know, boo frickin hoo. lol Sorry for the gloomy post. 
Gotta go work out now. I'll update later!


  1. Sometimes we aren't strong. The best we can do during that time is get through the day, and support other people. I hope the rest of your day is easier, and less painful dear. We don't judge, and we all know you are wonderful.
    Sending you skinnies dear, always!

  2. i'm sorry hun - we all lose strength more often than we'd like. but we pick it back up again. xx

  3. You mightn't see it love, but you're such an inspiration. That you can see a reflection and like it; even if it changes the next time you see it. You'll get there; I know it.




These are my opinions. You do not have to share them. If you disagree with me, please leave. If you are receiving treatment and do not wish to relapse, close this page. Neither you nor I can force the other to start or stop extreme dieting. You are here by choice. Extreme dieting is not good for you and I do not "suggest" or "endorse" it. However I will support you if you already feel the same as I do.