Giving up Something Good for Something Better.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Oh Dear...

“If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.”
Just a quick update. Or confession is more like it.
I binged anyway. =(

Well, sorta. I ate less than half of dinner (pork, salad and bread), but... right now I am eating a mix of Cheerios, Life cereal, peanuts and craisins (about 1 cup total)... :( I talked myself into it. And looking at your blogs isn't helping, I'm stuffing my face.

I am STUFFING MY FACE RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND.
 I guess that puts me at like 800 for today. Which, I guess isn't so much.
I never should have calculated my BMR that said I could eat 1345 calories a day, and if I add some light exercise I could eat a little over 1600, and subtract 500 from that every day and I will lose a pound a week or more. So, I learned I can eat 1100 a day and lose weight.
WHY DID I READ THAT?!?!? OMG! What did I think?! It was going to say "Eat 400 calories a day, not 500!"?! No, of course not. Things like that are for NORMAL PEOPLE who think a BMI of 19 is a GOOD BLOODY THING!! AUGH!!

....

Oh, good. To help me out my mom just gave me a bunch of M&M's and was like "Here! Yay!" And I was like ":D HAHA THANKS SO MUCH MOM!" Fuck. 
:( I have to say no to them...
This sucks.

Ugh. I will get through this.
<3 Love you ladies. 

I will work my ass off in a few hours, I promise.

EDIT:

Well, I just purged my snack and part of dinner and tossed those goddamn M&M's. 
Yay!

7 comments:

  1. I'm sorry to hear that today didn't go so well for you. But be proud that you were able to leave those M&Ms alone. No, not alone, you threw them out!

    I hope tomorrow is better. ♥

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  2. Aw dear, it's okay. I'm about to binge too. But I keep looking at old fat pics of me on facebook...90 more cals can't hurt, can it?

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  3. oh no, I'm sorry. I also had a weird talk-yourself-into-it binge night. It starts to feel like a binge might also be control. I wasn't even hungry when I started, I just woke up from a nap and realized I had to move my car and somehow that was a reason for me to stuff my face with a bunch of food I didn't want. Tomorrow will be better, this is about distance, not sprints.

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  4. put down the food!!! 800 isn't bad for the day at all but i don't want you beating yourself up later.
    i'm exactly like you - put an idea of how much i can actually get away with or do in my head and it never goes away.
    stay strong x

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  5. I <3 Reese, especially because she's from my hometown. My friend was an extra in Walk the Line, and he got to meet her. He said that she's even WAY TINIER in person than she looks on screen; he said he easily could have picked her up. Haha.

    Yay for tossing the M&Ms out. Not yay for purging. :( But I know how it goes.
    And I really know how you feel when people (including health experts) tell you that you need to eat more. It's the LAST freaking thing you want to hear! Gives me too much room to mess up.

    ReplyDelete
  6. **not from my hometown, but from my home state. lol

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh no! Poor thing!
    Feel better, crazy. xxx

    ReplyDelete

Tunes

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