The Pursuit of Pretty

 "There is no reason to fail. 

Truly believe that failure is not an option, and you won't.

You are better than the girl you were yesterday.
You are better than food."

This Lovely Evening

Hello again ladies!

 Dinner was pleasantly easy tonight! My dad even asked what I'd rather have, a baked potato or red beans and rice. Now, a baked potato is not only hard to resist but also hard to fake having eaten. Red beans and rice? Not that great and easy to make a mess of without taking a bite. So obviously! Red beans and rice sounds great, dad!

 Took the beans and rice, didn't have a SINGLE bite. I was tempted and just told myself, "Why? It doesn't even taste that good." And you know what? Nothing tastes THAT GOOD. We all say it. We all say, "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." But how often do you really feel that way? Lol I know it's a pretty empty saying to me nowadays, but tonight it really made sense. Like, oh, yeah, it's really not that fantastic. It's not that satisfying, it's not life changing, it's not anything I will be happy about, it might as well be a big pile of dust in the grand scheme of things. 

I ate maybe 1/3 of the 3oz piece of steak I took. I did eat all of my salad though, which I'm happy about. I can't eat nothing, I know that. I need sustenance. And the healthier the better. Yay salad! Today's intake is pretty low. I lowered my goal from 550 to 450 today, but I'm still only at 333 (if that much) so I may have some fruit or veggies later. 333 is such a great number though lol, so tempted to keep it.

Around this time of night (11pm) I start thinking, "Hmm.. What's in the pantry that I can eat.. Oooh, peanuts and craisins.. Cereal and granola bars.." All things I tend to binge on. They're not "junk food" by most people's standards, so I tell myself it's okay to eat them, but they turn into binges quickly. 300 calories of peanuts, craisins and cereal is not okay at 11pm, and it can quickly get much worse. And one night of binging can lead to a morning, maybe a day, maybe a week of binging. It all starts somewhere. Trying to be really in tune with my triggers, my strengths and how it falls apart and how I regain control so I can twist my mind and habits to work for me, not against me.

So I've been pampering myself a lot at night when my binge instincts kick in. Doing something good for myself when normally I'd do something bad! What a concept! I've been taking really long bubble baths (I have birthday cake scented bubble bath right now!) with a nice hot cup of tea next to me, relaxing music and sugar cookie scented candles, and I let the bathroom get nice and steamy and delicious and let my mind just go... It's the best to really clear your head, or even just think of things other than food. Time just slips away. You can't go grab a snack when you're mid-bath! Then when I've turned into a prune and can't stand to be soaking any longer I lather myself up with moisturizer, drench my hair in conditioner, do my nails, face treatment and brush my teeth. Last night I started all of this fairly early, so I even changed the sheets on my bed (which didn't quite need it) and examined every page of this month's Victoria Secret and Frederic's of Hollywood catalogs (imaging what it will be like to look good in their lingerie!), as well as my sister's Teen Vogue that I snatched before going to sleep. ;)

Questions for You Guys!

1) Anyone have a good fix for stretch marks? :( I definitely have them on my thighs. 

2) Also, what do you use for lip treatment/chapstick?

In Response to Your Comments
 
Wow! Thank you all so much for the comments!

Lottie - Thanks so much lovie! <3 Glad you enjoy it!

Kate - Thank you so much! I just got your email too and will be responding soon, you are so so beautiful!! Also I feel like I'm friends with a celebrity now. Everybody knows your blog, and I totally had that photo of your tree tattoo saved in my thinspo folder on my comp. OMG. I must have forgotten! <3 Love you!! xoxoxo

Alex - I'm so glad it inspires you too, and I hope it helps! <3 Thank you so much!

A - Thank you so much, you are so sweet! I think I will be too, yay! <3

Olivia - Thank you so much! Your blog has been so inspiring to me, I'm glad I can return the favor! <3!! xoxo

Monika - Don't give up love, you are worth fighting for. When I get down on myself about something my boyfriend always says, "So? What are you going to do about it? Cause if there's nothing you can do, you've got to move on. And if there is, you've got to figure out what and just do it." And he's so right. Let go of your guilt, turn the page, make a new plan. Nothing is holding you back girl, you can do anything you set your mind to. You just have to believe it, and there's no reason why you shouldn't believe it. You have every reason, right and ability to succeed at anything you want! And I'll be here to support you, we all will. <3 Thank you so much hon, feel better!

Determined girl - Thank you! You are too kind! I'm so glad you enjoy it, I hope I can keep you inspired and entertained in the future too, hehe! Good luck with your goals as well! <3

Today's Intake

 

Breakfast: 1 apple (50 cal)

Lunch/Snack: 2 peanuts (8 cal)
1 prune (25 cal)

Dinner: Less than 3oz steak (<180 cal)
Salad with light honey mustard dressing (70 cal)

Fluids: Iced Pomegranate Green Tea x3 (0 cal)

Red Goji and Raspberry Green Tea x2 (0 cal)

Passionfruit and Raspberry Green Tea x2 (0 cal)

Water (0 cal) 

Total: • 333 cal
(Today's Goal: 450)

Calorie Calendar (4/11 - 4/17)

♥	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
Calories	• 615	• 263	• 455	• 333	400	500	500
Weight	113.3	?	112.9	111.2	-	-	-

Calorie Goal :: Calorie Total :: • Met Goal :: • Over Goal :: • Incomplete 
Weight Loss: 2.1 lbs :: Weight Gain: 0 lbs 

Weekly Goals:

• 110 lbs by the end of the week.

 • Download new work out music
• Take new measurements of waist, arms, legs, etc.